Video game commentator and culture critic RazörFist savaged the first trailer for IO Interactive’s newly announced James Bond game, 007 First Light.
In a video titled “007: LICENSE TO TWINK,” after a brief introduction and a clip from the game’s trailer, RazörFist begins by lamenting that his hopes had already been crushed with the game’s first teaser image, “I noted after the early teaser image that I was likely in for a long hard dick flattening as I was personally hoping against hope for a James Bond game set in the 60s. A bit more book and a little less Jason Bourne bulls**t. But one look at the damn drug dealer watcher on James’ wrist there and I knew I was in for a disappointment of Stephanie Sterling proportions.”
A little bit later in his video, he trashes the trailer for having Moneypenny rob Bond of his iconic introduction, “If the trailer’s any indication James Bond gets his first 50 kills before he can pronounce the D sound in his own surname. Oh, wait! Did I say he? I meant Melinda Muffhair masquerading as Moneypenny says his name.”
After playing the clip where the race-swapped Moneypenny robs Bond of his introduction, RazörFist continues, “Really, Lubabonte Quanda? You can’t even give the man his own name? How’d you’d like it if James Bond showed up mid introduction and cut you off three tongue clicks deep. James doesn’t show up to where you work and knock the nail file out of your hand, b***h, but you’d probably just grab your girlfriend’s ass. Let the man have his catchphrase.”
From there, he took issue with the game’s blatant DEI agenda, “And what are there like two white people left in the entirety of MI6? M’s an Injun exchanging stilted exposition with a basketball American. And if Moneypenny were any more brown she’d be stealing my bike.”
“Hitman with a 007 skin sounds like something you couldn’t bring yourself to bork, but by God, it looks like IO Interactive are going to give it the old clown college try,” he continued. “Cry culture war clickbait all you like, you deeply original thinker, you. There’s DEI dripping from the walls of this wankfest. And anyone whose eyes aren’t jammed clean up their bonus hold could see it from space.”
Next, RazörFist took issue with the character design and his age. “Why is James Bond being impersonated by the twink from Jedi Fallen Order? And why is he the age of a zygote?”
“Young Bond? Really, retards? The first book in the series, Casino Royale, makes clear that even at that incipient juncture Bond had a higher body count than Lily and Phillips. Suddenly, Bond’s a little bashful about bumping b****es off. Hell, contrary to the tagline in the opening crawl alone, Bond kills more people than prostate cancer,” he said. “The lone official Fleming-approved illustration of James Bond has crow’s feet, bloodhound jowls, and a hairline like Count Chocula. How the hell do we go from this to the Gerber baby? This homo makes Justin Bieber look like Johnny Cash.”
Despite the harsh criticism, RazörFist did note, “Look, if the game is indeed Hitman with James Bond wallpaper, I’ll probably play it until my thumbs fall off . There’s a reason Hitman is the only AAA stealth series remaining on the market. And that’s because it happens to be jiggling titties.”
However, he then concluded, “It’s just a shame that if DEI has its way, by the next game, Bond will have jiggling titties.”
READ: Miis Reportedly Genderless On Nintendo Switch 2
Of note, IO Interactive has made it abundantly clear this is not Fleming’s James Bond. In a post about the game on Steam, the developer noted that the game is “a story-driven action-adventure game featuring a standalone original, re-imagined origin story of a young James Bond.”
IO Interactive CEO Hakan Abrak also noted, “We’re pouring our energy and passion for the franchise into creating a cinematic adventure that pushes the boundaries of what a James Bond game can be, while telling a fresh, new story. We can’t wait for players and fans to discover an experience tailor-made for them.”
What do you make of RazörFist’s reaction to the trailer?
NEXT: 'Nioh 3' Pushes Evil Gender Ideology With Body Type 1 And 2 Rather Than Male And Female
Razor is correct. The DEI on display is painful on the eyes.
Vote with your wallet and playtime you have all the power.
Do not support jewish Marxist Communists Indoctrination.
Xbox Sony Nintendo is dead play on PC and Mobile phones/Tablet.